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How to cope with anxiety when starting school or university

Magdalena García — Mon, 07 Sep 2026 12:32:58 +0000

September is an interesting month: new classrooms and buildings, new people, new routines and for some, a new level of independence. For some, this can bring excitement about a fresh start, but also a tight feeling in the chest, homesickness, and even loneliness.

But homesickness and anxiety are not a character flaw. They’re a completely normal and expected response to a big change, and it doesn’t mean that they’re not ready.

Sometimes, life changes simply take time to adjust.

Why transitions feel hard

It’s easy to assume that homesickness means something is wrong, especially if you think everyone has settled in fine, and you’re the exception. But homesickness is so much more than missing home. It’s also about missing family, your friends, your home, a favourite meal, or knowing how each day will look like.

It can also be about the comfort of being somewhere where you don’t have to think about where to go, who to sit with, or what you’re supposed to do next. You don’t get decision fatigue.

Homesickness also doesn’t mean that you’re not excited to become more independent. You can be excited about university and still miss home terribly. You can love your new school and still have moments when you want to go back to your old school you’re familiar with.

These feelings can coexist. Homesickness is a natural response to change and doesn’t need to be eliminated immediately.

But let’s look at other things that can impact transitions:

Decision fatigue: as mentioned before, starting somewhere new requires an enormous amount of mental energy. Think about how many decisions you make during your day without really thinking about them: what to eat, where to go, who to sit with, when to study, etc. When everything is new, those decisions require conscious thought and can cause mental exhaustion from making lots of choices: Where is the lecture room? What time should I leave? Where should I sit? Should I go to this event?
Friendship pressure: starting somewhere new comes with an unspoken belief: everyone is immediately making friends. Should I be making friends already? Shouldn’t I have a friend group by now? The urgency can make normal social awkwardness, or struggling to connect with new people, feel like a personal failure, when in reality most people feel the same way (some hide it better!). What we see from other people is rarely the whole picture.
Comparison: social media can make things more intense. It can make you feel that everyone else is having the time of their life. But nobody posts the quiet Tuesday night where they missed their favourite meal or called an old friend since they felt lonely.

There is no universal timeline for settling in.

How can we work through it?

Build one small anchor routine. It doesn’t have to be big – same coffee order each morning, a phone call home once a week, a short walk before a lecture. Predictability, even on a small scale, can help steady the rest of your day. Small routines can provide a sense of stability when everything else is changing.
Let friendships happen slowly. The closest friendships rarely form in week one. They build through time and repetition. Attend your lectures and familiarise yourself with the people there.
Name the feeling instead of fighting it. Talk to someone you trust about your anxieties, loneliness, or homesickness. Message someone when you need connection. If that doesn’t feel doable, write it in a journal or speak to someone at university or school when you’re struggling. Pretending it’s not there can make things bigger.
Limit comparison. If scrolling through social media makes you feel worse, it’s completely fine to take a break or not engage with it. Remember: their feed isn’t the full story.
Go outside and move your body. It’s simple: a short walk, a couple of minutes outside, and moving can help regulate your mood, especially during life changes and stressful adjustments.

And most importantly, you don’t have to figure everything out at once. Reduce the pressure to solve everything immediately. Ask yourself, “What would make today feel a little easier?”, instead of, “How am I going to cope with the whole year?”

What can you do as a parent?

Transitions can be difficult for parents, too.

You might worry and feel anxious about whether your child is really okay. It’s even harder to watch your kid struggle from a distance. Our first instinct could be to call frequently, ask lots of questions and try to fix it.

Try checking in rather than hovering. What helps most is being a steady presence more so than taking control. A message like, “How’s it going?” Or “Thinking of you. No need to reply, just wanted you to know I’m here if you need it”. Let them lead with what they want to share and give them space to develop their independence while making it clear support is always available.
Resist the urge to solve it immediately. If they’re venting about a bad week at school or the first week of uni, it’s tempting to jump straight to advice. Sometimes (and more often than not) we want to be heard and validated first.
Resist the urge to interpret every difficult day as evidence that they’ve made the wrong decision. You can say things like, “It’s okay that this feels hard right now. You don’t have to decide anything today. Let’s give it some time.”
Don’t take distance personally. Their not answering every time you call or shorter replies to messages (even no replies) is very often about them building independence, not about you.

Remember that your child might not always tell you when they’re struggling. If you keep communication open, without demanding constant updates, it can be easier for them to come to you when they do need support.

When is it more than homesickness?

Adjustment difficulties and homesickness are common and expected, especially during the first weeks of a major transition. Most people start feeling more settled within a few weeks to a couple of months.

However, it’s worth paying closer attention if you notice:

Withdrawing almost completely from other people and social contact, not just feeling shy.
A low mood that isn’t lifting or is getting worse over time, rather than gradually easing.
Real trouble sleeping, eating or getting out of bed.
Loss of interest in things that used to matter to them or would normally enjoy.
Being unable to attend school, lectures or other essential activities.
Talk of hopelessness or worthlessness, or wanting to leave entirely with no plan to adjust first.

If any of these sounds familiar for yourself or someone you know, it’s better to seek support sooner than waiting for it to become more intense. You can reach out to student wellbeing teams at university or schools, a GP or other appropriate professional to help assess what’s going on and identify the right support needed.

Where a coach can help

A coach can be a useful source of support during a period of transition.

For students who want extra support, a coach can help them build routines, set realistic social goals, manage the workload and homesickness. Coaching tends to be more practical and forward-looking, where you can build skills and structure to handle a specific adjustment.

Having someone outside your family to talk things through makes it easier to separate normal discomfort from change from things that genuinely need addressing.

You are allowed to take your time

Starting somewhere new is meant to feel strange for a while, and it’s a significant transition.

The discomfort isn’t a sign you’re doing it wrong.

You don’t have to feel confident on the first day.
You don’t have to love every aspect of your new life immediately.
You don’t have to make your best friends in the first week.
Feeling homesick is not a sign you’re not coping.

Give yourself, and your child, permission to transition slowly, one step at a time.

Author: Magdalena García

Clinical Psychologist and Psychotherapist

The post How to cope with anxiety when starting school or university appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

6 realistic and simple tips for self-care

Magdalena García — Mon, 12 Aug 2024 14:45:26 +0000

Sometimes, taking care of ourselves can seem like a daunting task, especially since we’re exposed to so much information about what to do and what not to do.

Here are some simple but effective ways to take care of yourself when life feels too much.

1. Get out of Bed

It seems simple and easy, but sometimes, when we’re feeling intense symptoms of anxiety or depression, it can seem impossible.

So get out of bed, even for just one minute. Sit outside or have some tea for half an hour, and the next day will be easier.

2. Change Your Clothes

If you managed to get out of bed, try changing into something else: another shirt, trousers, or socks. It can even be another set of pyjamas!

3. Take a shower

Many people recommend taking a long bath with special salts as a form of self-care (Which definitely works!), but even a quick 5-minute shower can change your day.

Then, you can wash your face, brush your teeth and see where the day takes you!

4. Watch your favourite film or TV show

Distracting yourself to deal with your emotional experience when it’s too intense is different from avoiding your problems or repressing them. Sometimes, we need to calm our nervous system first to cope.

So watch that show that makes you laugh, your favourite film that makes you feel at home, or even your favourite YouTube video! And as a bonus, you can add your favourite film and show from your childhood.

5. Take your medication

From medication that helps with your anxiety and mood stabilisers to your daily vitamins and hayfever tablets.

6. Try a creative hobby

You can draw, paint, colour books, or write and journal. Sometimes, even playing an instrument, listening to music, or reading a book can be an act of self-care.

And lastly, take it easy.

There are moments in our lives when everything seems impossible. Days and weeks seem difficult, but taking care of yourself is important, even if it’s a small act of kindness and self-care.

And remember that some days, just being you is enough.

Author: Magdalena Garcia

Integrative Psychotherapist, BSc, PGDip, MSc (Dist), MBACP (Accred)

The post 6 realistic and simple tips for self-care appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

How affirmations can help children and young people with their anxiety

Valentina Sartore — Wed, 17 Apr 2024 15:03:36 +0000

The way we speak to ourselves can have a big impact on our mood, our self-concept (the way we feel about ourselves), and our mental well-being.

Have you ever found yourself looking in the mirror before an important meeting or an exam and said “you can do this!”, or “you’re prepared, you know what you’re doing!” to your reflection? These are examples of positive affirmations, small acts of self-encouragement which are simple, but can be helpful for managing difficult situations and feelings if incorporated in our day to day life with intention.

Research supports the efficacy of affirmations in reducing anxiety, promoting positive self-talk and improving psychological well-being, in several ways:

Affirmations can help us step back and take perspective:

A key aspect of anxiety, from a cognitive-behavioural therapy perspective, is that it makes our brain engage in ‘thinking traps’: for example, automatically imagining the “worst case scenario, or focusing only on the negative aspects of a particular situation.

One way this can be counteracted is through the process of “cognitive restructuring” which involves identifying these unhelpful thinking patterns (by taking a step back and observing what happens in our mind), and challenging the associated thoughts and predictions. Affirmations can help us see alternative, more balanced, and helpful perspectives.

One example is “thoughts are not facts, and I can choose not to believe them”.

They help us be kinder to ourselves:

Affirmations can help foster a sense of self-compassion and acceptance, which are important components of resilience in the face of anxiety. A big part of dealing with worry and anxious thoughts is accepting that they exist, and that they serve a purpose – often, to protect us from perceived danger or to help us feel more in control.

Acknowledging why they are happening can in turn help us feel more compassionate towards our anxious parts, whilst also encouraging us to take steps towards our goals even if anxiety tells us that we should not. By affirming one’s strengths, and ability to cope with challenges, we can build self-esteem and feel more empowered not to let anxiety control us.

Here are some examples I like to use: “I am brave and I am trying my best”, or “Anxiety makes me want to avoid things, but I choose to do them anyway”.

They help us self-soothe:

Affirmations can also be very effective for self-soothing. In times of intense anxiety, our brains go into “fight or flight” as they perceive danger, and our prefrontal cortex (the “logical”, rational brain) goes offline. Having a few simple sentences we can repeat to ourselves, can be helpful in those moments to calm ourselves down until we can feel better and think more clearly again.

“I am safe”, “I am protected”, “I will be okay” – are all things we crave to hear when we feel anxious, and we can do that through self-reassurance.

Incorporating such affirmations into relaxation techniques, such as breathing exercises or meditation can also be a great way to calm the nervous system and find some peace during a stressful time.

These are some of the ways in which affirmations can be helpful for anyone struggling with anxiety, and wanting to build self-esteem, speak more kindly to their self, and improving mood.

They can be helpful for anyone, however, I particularly like to use affirmations with children and teenagers. The concept is easy enough to grasp, so that time can be spent with the child thinking of good affirmations that resonate with them and their own interests, needs and preferences.

This can be done creatively, they can be handwritten onto post-its, painted, voice-recorded, or printed and hung somewhere around the house.

Finally, children and teenagers in particular may often get encouragement and praise from other people such as parents and teachers – but the most important words will always be the ones we say to ourselves. Empowering young people to find ways to speak to themselves kindly, positively, and in a way that is self-reassuring and encouraging can have a huge impact on their sense of self and how they deal with anxious times.

Author: Valentina Sartore

Psychotherapist, MSc, BSc (Hons)

The post How affirmations can help children and young people with their anxiety appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

Managing the Christmas Holidays

Valentina Sartore — Wed, 20 Dec 2023 15:14:42 +0000

Whilst the Christmas period can be a joyful time for many, it can also bring up difficult feelings, for several reasons: grieving loved ones who are no longer here, challenging family situations, or feeling the societal pressures to be ‘cheerful and jolly’ – all making this time hard to navigate for some.

I hope that the following tips may provide some ideas on how to manage a challenging time, or a dip in your mental health during the Holiday period.

It’s okay not to like Christmas!

Admitting that we don’t enjoy Christmas can feel hard: we may not want to “be a killjoy”, feel judged or questioned, so instead we may put on a mask and pretend to be having a good time, which can increase negative feelings and a sense of disconnect. Whilst you might not feel able to share your true experience, it is really important to remember that you are allowed not to like Christmas! It’s a lot more common than you think – we just don’t talk about it enough. If you have realised that you don’t share the same excitement about it than others do… that is okay. Give yourself permission to feel this way, instead of forcing yourself to be someone you are not. Acceptance can help us feel less guilty or frustrated with ourself for feeling a certain way, and instead paves the way to finding ways to manage.

Boundaries are key

Take some time now to think of any boundaries with others and yourself, that can help make this time more manageable.

For instance, saying no to certain events, asking family to meet up for a short time instead of a full day, or scheduling a few hours to spend on your own in your pyjamas. Particularly when we have big families, or complex ones, or expectations coming from all directions, a key thing to remember is that it is not your responsibility to make everyone’s Christmas perfect or enjoyable. You can be kind and show love and care to others, whilst still setting boundaries and prioritising yourself. After all, this is a time for you to also rest, recharge and have a pleasant time.

Plan some things that can help you escape

Around Christmas, you might be surrounded by people all the time, especially if you have a busy family, or many events scheduled. Whilst these can be enjoyable, it’s also important to find some quiet time to rest, or even ‘escape’ situations that can drain your battery. Take some time to come up with a few ideas of things you could do to recharge;

If you’re at home, going outside for a walk, or taking an hour to sit in your bedroom with music/a book can be helpful.

If you have many events planned, you could take a look at your calendar and schedule a few ‘nights in’.

Something I find helpful is also to immerse myself in media set in a completely different time of the year, decade, or even world. Watching non-Christmas films, reading fantasy books, or gaming can be helpful in providing an escape from life if it feels too much at the moment!

Be mindful of phone and social media use

We all hate being told to stay off our phones, but the reality is that the pressure of always being connected can be even higher at Christmas.

If you feel overwhelmed at the amount of phone-calls receive on the day, or guilty if you don’t answer or reach out to people, trying to let go of that pressure is crucial. Loved ones will understand that you’re busy and that it’s hard to reach out to everyone promptly. If you do want to ensure you check in with certain people, you could send a message a few days before – wishing them merry Christmas for the coming days and letting them know you will speak to them after the busyness has quietened. This could help take some pressure off Christmas Day.

Being inundated by social media content showing others’ Christmas celebrations can also be difficult, as it may lead us to compare our experiences with theirs, leaving us feeling like we are missing out or should be happier/doing more.

It’s key to remember that people only share a small percentage online of what their lives look like in reality, however accepting this can be easier said than done; we might still end up mindlessly scrolling through everyone’s posts and before we know it, two hours have passed and we feel awful. Whilst it might be frustrating to accept, the solution to this is to try and limit social media use during this time. Temporarily delete apps, turn off your phone, or leave it in a different room if needed. Find an activity that requires full concentration, or that you can’t do if you’re holding your phone, such as arts and crafts, knitting/crocheting, sports, reading. It will only be for a few days, and you might realise you didn’t miss it as much as you expected!

Stick to a routine

This might be simple, but it can help. This is a time when you might be off work, surrounded by family, have activities planned or even be in a different country. Maintaining some elements of routine, e.g. continuing your workout routine, waking up and going to bed at similar times daily, or taking time in the morning to yourself before the day begins, can help us feel less ‘all over the place’.

Connect with others and share how you feel

It’s important to acknowledge that Christmas can also be a time of increased sense of disconnect and loneliness for some of us. We may be physically alone, or feel alienated despite being surrounded by others, if we don’t feel safe or connected to them.

If you can, try to find a few people who you do feel comfortable with and plan to check-in with them. It could be helpful to share how you are feeling about Christmas, perhaps asking them to plan a non-Christmas activity or to talk about something different.

If you are really struggling, please remember that support is still available during the holidays; reach out to your GP, emergency services, or listening services such as Samaritans if you feel you need extra support.

Ultimately, this can be a lovely time, but it may also be tough to manage, and that is okay.

If you can, try to notice what you do like about Christmas – whether it’s seeing old friends, catching up with a loved one, eating lovely food or seeing the Christmas lights light up your town.

If you are struggling, do remember that you are not alone in feeling like this. It is okay not to enjoy this time, it does not reflect your overall mental health, recovery, or who you are all the time. This period will only last a few weeks, and then things will go back to the way they normally are. You can do this!

Take care.

Author: Valentina Sartore

Psychotherapist, MSc, BSc (Hons)

The post Managing the Christmas Holidays appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

Physical Grounding techniques for anxiety

Magdalena García — Mon, 12 Jun 2023 11:47:41 +0000

Grounding techniques aim to bring you back to the present. It distracts your mind from negative and challenging emotions and unwanted experiences to refocus on what is happening here and now.

They can help control your anxiety by turning your attention away from thoughts, worries, memories and refocusing on the present moment.

Grounding techniques usually can be physical, where you use your five senses or tangible objects to help you reconnect with your body or environment, or mental, where you use mental distractions to redirect your thoughts away from distress and reconnects you with the present. Some grounding techniques are a mix of both.

Here we’ll teach you a few physical grounding techniques to help you reconnect with the present.

Physical Grounding Techniques

5-4-3-2-1 Technique (Go through your senses)

This technique will force you to focus on your surroundings and use your senses.

5 – What are 5 things you can see?

4 – What are 4 things you can touch and feel?

3 – What are 3 things you can hear?

2 – What are 2 things you can smell?

1 – What is 1 thing you can taste?

Notice small details such as a pattern or an object you never notice.

Notice the sensation of your clothing on your body, the sun on your skin, or the chair or floor you’re sitting on.

Pay attention to distant sounds like the trees blowing, sounds made by objects, distant traffic or sounds your mind tries to tune out, like a ticking clock, the radio or people talking.

Try to notice smells around you, like perfume, coffee or food, or look for something that has a scent, like a candle or a flower.

Try a food and notice all the flavours. If you can’t, then imagine the taste of your favourite food.

Breathing Techniques

Try to concentrate on your breathing, and slow it down. Breathe deeply. Feel each breath filling your lungs, and notice how it changes when you breathe out.

Square Breathing or 4-4-4

Inhale to the count of 4.
Hold your breath for 4 seconds.
Exhale on the count of 4.
Hold your breath for 4 seconds.

4-7-8 Breathing

Inhale to the count of 4.
Hold your breath for 7 seconds.
Exhale to the count of 8.

Alternate Nostril Breathing

Use your thumb to close your right-hand nostril and inhale only through your left nostril.
Pinch your nose closed by bringing your ring finger to your left nostril, and temporarily hold your breath.
Open up your right nostril by removing your thumb, and exhale.
Inhale again through your right nostril.
Pinch your nose closed again and hold your breath for a moment.
Open up your left nostril and exhale.
Inhale again through your left nostril.
Repeat the cycle.

Use Water

You can put your face in cold water for a few seconds and then focus on the sensation of your skin. How does it feel? Is it different from before? How does the coldness feel against your skin?

You can also put your hands in water. You can use warm water first, then cold. Focus on the water’s temperature. How does it feel on your fingertips? Your palms? Does it feel the same in each part of your hand? Does it feel different when you switch from cold to warm?

Go on a Short Walk

Concentrate on your steps and count them. Notice your footsteps and how the ground feels with each step. Focus on the wind against your skin.

Move your body and pay attention to how it feels with each movement. You can do jumping jacks, jog or march in place, stretch, or jump a rope.

Hold a Piece of Ice

How does it feel? When did it start melting? How long did it take? Does it feel different? How does the sensation change?

Savour a Scent, a Food or a Drink

Choose a scent, food or drink that you enjoy. Inhale the fragrance, and notice whether it’s sweet, spicy, citrusy, etc. Taste each bite of the food you chase, and taste the flavours and smells that linger.

Pick one Item or an Object

Choose an item and place it in your hand. Close your eyes and feel its texture, weight, temperature, etc. Is it soft or hard? Warm? Etc.

Later, you can open your eyes and notice its colour, features and qualities.

Body Awareness Techniques

Body awareness techniques will bring you to the present by redirecting your focus to your body. Try any of these techniques separately, but remember to pay attention to the physical sensations.

Stamp your feet on the ground and march on the spot. Pay attention to the sensations on your feet and legs. How do they feel? Is it different when they’re in the air? How do they feel when they hit the ground?
Place both feet on the floor and wiggle your toes. Curl and uncurl them, and notice the sensation in your feet. Are you barefoot, or are you wearing socks?
Clench your hands into fists for 5 seconds, then release the tension. Repeat this, and notice how your hands feel.
Do stretching exercises and hold for 30 seconds each.
Notice how your body feels from head to toe. Notice your hair, the weight of your clothes on your shoulders and hips, how your arms feel at your sides, your heartbeat, your stomach (is it full or do you feel hungry?), and your legs and feet.

Author: Magdalena Garcia

Integrative Psychotherapist BSc, PGDip, MSc (Dist), (Reg MBACP)

The post Physical Grounding techniques for anxiety appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

Mental grounding techniques for anxiety

Magdalena García — Mon, 15 May 2023 15:03:10 +0000

Grounding techniques aim to bring you back to the present. It distracts your mind from negative and challenging emotions and unwanted experiences to refocus on what is happening here and now.

They can help control your anxiety by turning your attention away from thoughts, worries, memories and refocusing on the present moment.

Grounding techniques usually can be physical, where you use your five senses or tangible objects to help you reconnect with your body or environment, or mental, where you use mental distractions to redirect your thoughts away from distress and reconnects you with the present. Some grounding techniques are a mix of both.

Here we’ll teach you a few mental grounding techniques to help you reconnect with the present.

Mental Grounding Techniques

The Colour Game

This game helps you connect to your environment and disconnect from your troubling thoughts. You have to focus and notice your surroundings.

Choose any colour (red, green, yellow, blue, orange, black, white, etc.).

Then look around and find that colour.

Notice and name, if you can, the objects with that colour.

Repeat the process by picking a different colour.

The Alphabet Game

During this technique, you must name something for every alphabet letter within any category. This could be animals, foods, countries, or people’s names.

For example,

Apple

Bus

Canada

Dinosaur

…

To make it more challenging, choose only one category, and name one item for every alphabet letter.

The Categories Game

Choose one of the categories below, and name as many items as you can in each one. Spend a couple of minutes on each category to come up with as many items as possible.

Movies
Countries
Ice cream flavours
Cities
Books
Colours
Animals
Fruits and Vegetables
Cars
Sports games and teams
TV Shows
Famous People
Musical instruments

You can make up your own categories if you need to.

Use Maths and Numbers

Numbers help you focus on something besides your thoughts or uncomfortable physical symptoms. Here are a few examples:

Count backwards from 100.
Count backwards from 100 by subtracting each time by 7. Example: 100, 93, 86, 79, etc.
Run through a timetable in your head.

Objects and names

Name all the objects you see, and describe what’s around you. You can pick one and describe it in detail: colour, size, texture, scent, weight, etc.

You can use your five senses to provide as much detail as possible.

List your favourites

List three or five of your favourite things in different categories: food, movies, songs, books, places, etc.

Other mental grounding techniques:

Spell your full name, and then do it backwards. Then, choose the names of four other people and do the same.
Think of an object or an animal and “draw” it in your mind.
Recite a poem, song or quote you know by heart.
Visualise someone positive in your life, someone you love, and imagine their face and voice.
Listen to music. Put on your favourite song and focus on the lyrics and the melody.

Author: Magdalena Garcia

Integrative Psychotherapist BSc, PGDip, MSc (Dist), (Reg MBACP)

The post Mental grounding techniques for anxiety appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

Exposure Therapy

Robyn Spice — Tue, 02 May 2023 15:29:12 +0000

When we feel anxious or intimidated by something, an immediate reaction is often to avoid. Avoiding something in the short term can feel great! The thing that was stressing us is temporarily gone… Until it pops back up at a later date.

Exposure therapy is a type of psychological treatment that involves gradually and safely confronting a person with the things or situations that they fear or avoid. The goal of exposure therapy is to help individuals overcome their anxiety, phobias, or traumatic experiences by exposing them to these triggers in a controlled and supportive environment. By repeatedly facing their fears, individuals can learn to tolerate and manage their emotional and physical reactions, and gradually reduce their anxiety and avoidance behaviours over time.

Have you ever really wanted to do something but have felt too frightened to give it a go? This following example might be a useful framework to consider.

My rescue dog Marley was scared of water when I got him 5 years ago. I genuinely thought that all dogs could just naturally swim. Not Marley, as soon as he got close to any type of water, he would just panic.

As time has gone by, he’s started to get braver. After I worked out he was petrified of water, I found something he absolutely loves. The beach. When he’s at the beach her runs around like a little puppy. When he started to get a little more daring he would paddle in a really shallow part of the water. Over the last 5 years he’s taken gradual steps to reach where he is today. Today he accompanies me on my paddle board. He jumps onto the board, with his life jacket wrapped around him (seriously this dog sinks like a stone) and enjoys himself on the different Scottish lochs he gets to explore.

This hasn’t happened overnight. It has taken time, patience and creating a safe environment for him to allow himself to gradually move through the following different steps –

Being on the beach
Running next to the water at the beach
Watching other dogs play in the sea
Playing with other dogs in the shallow part of the sea
Chasing a ball into the sea
Surviving a wave coming over his head and realising he can swim
Playing on his own in water
Watching me going SUP boarding
Going on the SUP board on land
Getting on the SUP board in the water
Falling off the SUP board and again seeing he can swim.

When it comes to anxiety the most natural thing is to stop doing the thing that makes us anxious. However, what can be really useful is breaking things down into steps and little bit by little bit, face your anxiety. Marley didn’t jump straight into the deep end, but he also didn’t run completely away from the thing that made him anxious. He has learnt to tolerate his distress and now he’s enjoying his new favourite activity

Author: Robyn Spice

Psychotherapist MPhil BA Dip (Reg MBACP)

The post Exposure Therapy appeared first on TRC | London | Midlands | Edinburgh | Riyadh.

Can dogs improve our mental health?

Sofia Likhacheva — Mon, 17 Apr 2023 11:33:49 +0000

Dog assisted interventions for children and young adults.

“Dogs don’t rationalize. They don’t hold anything against a person. They don’t see the outside of a human but the inside of a human.”
– Cesar Millan

A large body of research shows that interactions with dogs have positive effect on children’s and young adults’ mental health and development. Those interactions involve various experiences, such as playing, petting, walking, brushing, and caring for a dog, as well as reflecting on these experiences to achieve particular mental, emotional, or social outcomes.

Supervised interactions with dogs combined with other therapeutic interventions were revealed seventy percent more effective than traditional treatments on its own, such as cognitive-behavioural therapy, in reducing the symptoms of stress, depression, anxiety, and post-traumatic stress disorder among children and adolescents. Researchers posit that two primary mechanisms help in explaining the above findings. Interactions with dogs diminish experiences of adverse mental states because they reduce the loneliness and provide unconditional acceptance and emotional support. From these findings, it was concluded that the success of dog-assisted interventions could be attributed to dogs’ ability to fulfil companionship needs, especially among individuals who communication difficulties and lack of social interactions. Therefore, dog assisted interventions are particularly beneficial for children affected with ASD and ADHD.

In the samples of children and adolescents with depression, anxiety, and stress, it was further revealed that interactions with dogs aid symptom reduction because they help to engage in emotion-focused coping. This form of coping is defined as a tendency to manage one’s distress by engaging in activities that increase the experience of positive emotions and thus help in reducing emotional reactions to stressors. In this respect, dogs were found to help children feel positive emotions, such as happiness, hope and acceptance, which then led to their higher propensity to approach other situations that are likely to build positive emotional states, such as seeking companionship with other people.

Dogs, therefore, can be said to help children of different ages to cope with psychological issues and mental health difficulties by assisting them to reconnect with the outside world, reduce loneliness, improve self-confidence and increase their tendency to engage in emotion-focused coping.

At TRC, based on the initial assessment, whenever considered appropriate, we offer Dog Assisted Therapy to help children and adolescents heal emotional issues and trauma, improve social skills, overcome studying difficulties and behavioural concerns. We have developed our own method, which combines Dog Assisted Therapy with Art Therapy, Play Therapy and Cognitive Behavioural Therapy. We approach each child differently, considering the age, special needs and requests. Some sessions are conducted individually with a child and some are based on parent-child interactions. Only trained and fully vaccinated dogs are engaged in therapy. Our approach to therapy is child-centred, mindful, and play-based. We believe that children learn and develop best when they are relaxed and having fun, when they are surrounded by people attentive to their needs and truly interested in their views and opinions.

-Dog Assisted Therapy

Dogs can have amazing therapeutic benefits for children with complex emotional and behavioural needs. Interactions with dogs in supervised settings teach children empathy and compassion, strengthen social and communication skills, boost self-confidence, improve sensory and emotional regulation, reduce stress and anxiety, help to overcome fears and much more.

-Play Therapy

For children playing is the natural way of learning, communicating and developing.

Therefore, to meet children where they are at developmentally, play therapy is the best modality to create positive change. Games help to motivate and engage children. Through games children reveal their hidden emotions, fears and issues, giving therapist an opportunity to help them.

-Art Therapy

Art therapy provides children with a simpler and more direct way to express themselves than talking therapy alone. Children are naturally creative and comfortable expressing emotions with pencils and paint. Artwork helps to reveal child’s underlying emotions and to establish better conversation between the child and the therapist.

– Cognitive behavioural therapy

Cognitive behavioural therapy (CBT) is a type of talk therapy. CBT helps children to look at their thoughts, feelings, and behaviours, and to realize they have control over it. This therapy can help children understand and register the negativity of their thought patterns and learn how to replace those thoughts with more helpful ones. Discovering new ways of looking at things helps a child learn how to respond differently.

Author – Sofia Likhacheva, Psychotherapist at TRC London

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How to help someone who is having a panic attack

Magdalena García — Wed, 05 Apr 2023 11:28:24 +0000

A panic attack is a sudden and intense feeling of anxiety and fear. During a panic attack, a person can have mental and physical symptoms, which are not dangerous but can be very frightening.

Symptoms of a panic attack can include:

An accelerated heart rate or palpitations
Increased sweating
Shaking or trembling
Chest pain
Nausea
Feeling dizzy
Breathlessness
Feeling disoriented or detached from oneself

They can make you feel like you’re having a heart attack or that you’ll lose control or even die, which can be frightening.

Most panic attacks last between 5 to 20 or 30 minutes. However, everyone’s experiences with panic attacks may be different.

Watching someone we know having a panic attack can be very scary and upsetting. However, there are things you can do to help:

Stay with the person and try to stay calm.

Don’t pressure them to do more than they feel comfortable with. Let them know that you’re there for them and that they’re safe.

Move the person to a quiet place if possible.

Encourage them to sit with you and stay with them until the panic attack is over. And let them know that you’re not leaving.

Be patient.

And gently let them know you think they’re having a panic attack and that you’re there for them.

They may not be friendly or helpful, but remember, they may not be aware of what they’re saying and are frightened.

Ask them what they need.

And make your sentences short and simple. Listen to their wishes, and respect their pace and what feels okay for them. If they can’t talk, that’s okay. You just need to stay with them.

5. Help and encourage them to breathe slowly.

One of the most common panic attack symptoms is rapid and heavy breathing. Try encouraging them to take slow, controlled breaths.

You can even breathe with them and ask them to follow your inhales and exhales.

You can count out loud or even tap their arms and ask them to focus on that.

You can try “square breathing”: breathe in for four seconds, hold for four seconds, breathe out for four seconds, hold for four seconds, and repeat.

Try it for at least three minutes.

A common misconception is asking someone to breathe into a paper bag, but don’t do it! It could be dangerous.

Just encourage them to breathe slowly and deeply.

6. Help them focus on something else.

Ask them to focus on their breathing. If that’s too much, ask them to copy and follow yours.

Ask them to watch you gently raise your arm.

Ask them to focus on your voice.

7. Encourage them to stamp their feet on the spot.

March on the spot with them and stamp your feet. It helps to ground them and bring them back to the present.

8. Try more grounding techniques.

Ask them to name five things they can see around them.

Ask them to name four things they can touch.

Ask them to name three things they can hear.

Ask them to name two things they can smell.

Ask them to name one thing they can taste.

9. Try the alphabet game.

This is another grounding technique that can help the person that is having a panic attack focus on the present.

The alphabet game involves naming something for every letter of the alphabet. It could be animals, people’s names, foods, countries, an object, etc.

These tips can help you support your friend or family member who’s having a panic attack. Try to remember that it may take time and to be patient.

Moreover, it may be overwhelming and challenging to support someone who’s having a panic attack. So it’s essential to look after your own well-being and mental health.

Remember, we need to take care of ourselves before caring for others.

Author: Magdalena Garcia

Integrative Psychotherapist BSc, PGDip, MSc (Dist), (Reg MBACP)

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Tips to take care of your mental well-being during the holidays

Magdalena García — Thu, 15 Dec 2022 13:04:41 +0000

Christmas can be a lovely time, with loving memories and family gatherings. However, it can also be tough and challenging.

Here are some simple yet helpful tips on coping with the stress of the holiday season. Some of these tips may not be relevant to you, and that’s ok. Try different things and figure out what works best for you.

Take time to recharge. We often forget that our social and emotional batteries can feel depleted after (and during) the holidays. It’s essential to give ourselves time to rest and reset in whichever way we need.

For some people, it’s about having coffee with a friend or going on long walks; for others, it’s about being by themselves with a cup of tea and a good book.

And if you’re worried about being productive, remember: taking time to recharge is productive too!

Start a daily gratitude list. List a minimum of five things that you are grateful for or happy about in your life. Challenging our minds to focus on the positives, even if it’s just for a minute, can help us change our mindset and change the course we may be on. You focus on the present and leave the future and the past alone for a few minutes.

You can start small (be thankful for today’s coffee) or something more significant (your health and your family).

So ask yourself this question: what are five things to be grateful for today?

Be around people that make you feel safe. If you’re struggling with loneliness during the holidays, plan ahead and organise a coffee date or something else with a person you value and feel safe with. If, on the other hand, you’re struggling to deal with triggering family members, plan a meeting or a call with someone you feel safe to talk about your struggles.

If you can (and want to), find a time to meet or talk to a friend or someone you value.

Say no. Setting boundaries is crucial for our mental well-being, especially during the holidays. It can bring a sense of safety and comfort if we’re struggling. Some boundaries may work, while others may not, and that’s ok. Maintaining as many as possible is enough sometimes. Some people may not understand and disagree with them, but that doesn’t mean they shouldn’t respect them.

However, if you can’t avoid a difficult situation, try to plan something for yourself afterwards to help reduce stress or discomfort.

Avoid comparisons. If you go on social media, avoid comparing your holiday experience with your friends or people you follow. Remember that people share the best versions and bits of their life. They do not reflect real life or even how your life should be.

We are all different, and that’s the beauty of it. If you need to, limit your exposure to social media or TV and focus on the moment, family time, or any other social events you have going on.

And as we all know: social media is not reality, and we only see the curated version of everyone.

Move your body in some way. Try to go on a walk around the park (or around the block), a morning stretch or a dancing session with your family. A change of scenery may be necessary when we have to deal with many social events, and going on a winter walk can be a good way to get some fresh air.

Maybe add a cosy playlist, an exciting audiobook or podcast, or invite a close friend to join you if you don’t want to be alone.

Talk to someone if you need to. Ask for help, call a friend or meet with someone you trust if you’re feeling overwhelmed or worried about Christmas or New Year. Let people you trust know you’re struggling and tell them what you need, as it can help to talk to someone about how you’re feeling. Even telling people what questions or topics you’d rather avoid and not discuss.

Don’t be afraid to reach out to someone if you need to, and don’t forget that you don’t have to justify yourself to others.

Be kind to yourself. Try not to put yourself under too much pressure, and remember to put yourself first. Accept who you are, and don’t try to become someone else to please others. Moreover, sometimes kindness comes in different forms. For example, getting enough sleep during the holidays is a form of self-care.

Be gentle and patient with yourself and prioritise what you need.

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